Sunday 5 July 2009

123.

I don't really like Sunday nights. They make me kinda sad and lonely. The weekends are good, Friday and Saturday nights it's usually friends, booze, or whatever. But Sunday night is always the dread night, of facing another week of work. And it's the night that I seem to crave company a lot.

So I drank a bit too much last night and I really should just not be allowed to use my mobile phone when I drink. I feel like quite an idiot. And I still have not heard from said person.
But that's nothing new lately.. I know that I should be understanding. I know that they are going through hell right now. But I feel like they are just pushing me away. Maybe it's kinda my own fault for getting hopeful about things being like they were once. But that's me, ever the eternal optimist.

This whole 'being the relaxed, and not full on or stressy' thing.. I'm not quite sure how it's working for me just yet. I wonder a little bit if I'm just squashing my real feelings or whether it's really how I am now.

I think too much...

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