Okay, so I just sat here and wrote out this super long post reflecting on my year. And then my internet fucked up and deleted the whole thing.
That would be a good indication on how 2008 was for me. Full of ups and downs, things fucking up at totally the wrong time, and just general chaos for a whole lot of the year.
I decided that I'm not going to make any 'new years' resolutions this year. I'm going to make some life resolutions. Because why should I have to wait for new years to make resolutions about what I want to change or improve about my life and myself.
2008 was a strange year for me. But it taught me a lot about myself, and what I am capable of.
It was my year of being single, and playing the field. Getting my heart broken a million times, swearing off men, and getting myself into a lot of awkward situations.
It was the year I nearly quit my job, after I was moved to a temporary new position and totally hated it. It was the year, when things got so bad that a few times I considered running away and not coming back. It was the year that I decided that I wasn't going to let people walk all over me anymore, and when I started to stand up for myself. And it was the year that I realised that I'm not perfect, and I never will be - but that it was okay and that I would be alright.
I realised that I'm way too hard on myself sometimes, but that's a good thing I think. Because I didn't just settle for things that were just okay.
In 2008 I lost some friends, old friends. I know that we still talk, but I'm pretty sure that the bond we had isn't there anymore. And that's okay. Because that's life. People change, people grow up, and some people don't grow up.
I made new friends, who are some of the greatest people ever. I had so many fun times hanging out with these kids, and I wouldn't trade them for the world.
You guys know who you are :)
I got my first tattoo, I developed my own little style. I discovered so many new amazing bands.
I realised that some things never change.
And I found someone who is just completely amazing. Someone who I've totally enjoyed getting to know over the last month or so. And I started to feel things that I thought were locked away in a little box somewhere deep inside me. I started to trust again. And I started to.. well.. yes. :D
I'm glad that 2008 happened, it was the year that taught me so much about life, and about myself as a person. And I think it was the year that I finally started to become the woman I am meant to be. I am Emma Jane.. and it's okay to be Emma Jane.
I can't wait to see what 2009 brings for me.
Happy New Year's Eve everyone, and keep reading!
I love you all.