159.

children don't grow up. our bodies get bigger, but our hearts get torn up.

Last night. I held a tiny little 6 day old baby. I just looked her and melted.
She is so small, and so innocent.
Untouched by heartbreak, loss, prejudice, and everything bad in the world.

It's a precious gift that children have, that gift of innocence, and the eternal optimism that everything will be alright because mum or dad say so.

There's a lot to be said for embracing that quality, and embracing your inner child.
I think I've probably written a little bit about this before. But it's something that I truly believe in. That sense of optimism, however naive it might be. It's really what gets me through the day.

There's a song that I love, and the lyrics really speak to me.

why do we like to hurt so much?

What makes us go back for seconds, in a situation where we know that we are going to get hurt, disappointed, or let down?

Are we as humans a little bit addicted to pain?
I don't mean physical pain so much, but more emotional pain.
Are some of us addicted to that melancholy feeling?

I think that sometimes, hurt and sadness can be a more powerful emotion than happiness.
So many times I have seen people get what they want.
Then throw it away, fuck it up, or be bored with it.

Are we wired to be addicted to the longing, wanting what we can't have?

It's something I think about a lot.
Can anybody ever truly be happy?
What happens when you get exactly what you want?
Where do you go from there?
What do you have to aim for, to work for, what do you have to challenge you?

Maybe that's why we like to hurt a little bit.
Hurting reminds us that we are real.
It makes us strive to be happy again.

And as much as I dig the eternal optimism.
I think it's good to hurt a bit sometimes.

If we never went through the shit times, how would we ever learn to appreciate the rad times?